Do you suffer from (blank)? Feel (blank) lately? Or do you (blank) too much and have trouble (blank, blank and blank) at night? If you are otherwise healthy, 18-49 years old, m/f and also are a non-smoker with no history of stroke, VD and not currently pregnant you can participate in a (blank) University Hospital research study. You will be given free treatment and meds and only need to commit to 4 days a week monitored overnights for two months. In the past we paid handsomely for making you our trusting test subject, but now only re-imburasble carfare is available in spite of our 200 million dollar endowment from (blank) (bailed out by the Government) Financial Services Company. Call 617-big-scam (cell phone of a student with no liability) right away to start!
If you have read an ad like this today you were likely on the Redline subway train in Boston.